Well the years between there and here were filled with several such incidences. I wont bore you with all the details but there are a few that need to be shared just so you can understand and appreciate events that lead up to this day. Oh how I wish I had never been born.
The next, incident shall we say, happened in 6th grade. The whole sixth grade class was at Camp Cachooga. It was the high light of every 6th graders life. One week out in the wilderness, becoming one with nature, enjoying the outdoors, canoeing, swimming, archery, hikes and bears.
We were all finishing up our smores and scary stories around the campfire and it came time for the long awaited night hike. It was the final hike of the camp. We were all excited, the campfire was burning out and the camp counselor had advised us to get a partner. That should have been my first indication that the world was against Lisa and me ever fulfilling our destiny to be joined in matrimony and live happily forever after.
Tommy quickly walked up to Lisa’s side offered his arm which she gladly accepted…NO! The word escaped my lips before my brain had time to process the ramifications of my actions. You guessed it everyone looked again in my direction and I had no answer. They began to trek into the woods and I was left with Rodney.
Rodney was an okay kid, he was just a little different. He always seemed to have a cold and he tended to smell. Worse yet no one I mean no one wanted to be left in the woods walking alone with Rodney, and sure enough here I was. The group had gone ahead and we were left by a dieing fire. The fire that represented my dreams of a life with Lisa.
Rodney smiled at me chocolate and marshmallow covered his cheeks. Together we trudged after the group. I couldn’t believe it. I was following Rodney into the dark woods. We could hear the giggles and talking of the group ahead. There was just enough moon light for me to make out bushes and such. After a while I started to enjoy myself again. I am a cup half full person after all. I still had tomorrow and that would be the day I won Lisa’s heart, at least I thought.
The sound came and interrupted my planning, it was a crack, like something had broken a stick. Rodney stopped and I ran into the back of him. His odoriferous body was pressed right against my face, I can still remember the smell like it was yesterday. I gagged. We listened and Rodney suggested that we pick up the pace. I will be the first to admit I am no woodsman so if something was large enough to make the sound we heard I was not going to pull out a knife and try and grin it down.
Rodney started to run and so did I. We had not heard the group for a while so I hoped Rodney was leading us in the right direction. Rodney fell then and there was a loud growl behind us. I was frozen laying on top of Rodney, he kept saying something, but I couldn’t hear him. I was too concerned with what was coming up behind us.
In my defense I had never been in the woods in the dark. I’m a city boy and up until that night the largest animals I had seen were horses under mounted policemen. The sound then seemed to be coming from all around us and…I am ashamed to admit it but I screamed…loud…like a girl. It was not one of those manly screams you let go of while on the roller-coaster, no, it was high pitched.
Light flooded in around us and there they were our classmates standing, with flashlights in hand, pointing in our direction; me lying on Rodney screaming like a banshee. Need I explain more?
After the group composed themselves from laughing they headed back to camp and I found myself alone again in the dark woods with Rodney. This time I took the lead. I did not want Rodney to fall again. I had had enough embarrassment to last a life time.
We were almost back to camp when we heard another growl. I was not to be fooled this time. I bent down and found a large stick. If they thought they were going to scare me again, they had another thing coming. I threw the stick in the direction of the noise. I had expected the lights to be turned on again. I was wrong, out of the woods came the largest, most fierce bear to ever roam the mountains. I screamed again, turned and ran. Later Rodney said it was just a raccoon, I don’t think we seen the same animal.
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